In the spirit of Father’s Day, I want to write a special tribute to my father. Often tributes are made to our parents once they have passed away, but I want to honor my dad today as a reminder to our community on how important our fathers play in our lives. Although 43% of children in our country live without their father, the statistics are clear that fathers play a large role in their children, our future. There is no better time than on Father’s Day to show the love to our dads.
My dad lives in Sullivan, a small town in southern Indiana. He spent his life building his physical therapy practice, along with my step mom who also is a physical therapist. Together they helped thousands of people in their community through physical therapy. I will never quite know the large impact their career choice has made to others. I do know that my dad has impacted my life in many ways.
My favorite memory of my dad is watching him in the drivers seat, pulling out of the drive way and heading straight south to our timeshare in Orlando. He always dressed for the occasion, with a Hawaiian shirt and a straw hat. He was a closet smoker for the longest time, even though we all knew every time we’d make a pit stop, he’d smoke one of his Black and Milds in the rest rooms. Now as a parent of two very energetic children, I can completely relate to the need for a break on a road trip! We enjoyed playing the ABC game where we would race to be the first to find each letter from A to Z from the signs. He knew where every Dairy Queen Brazier sign was along the way and he would make small talk about how if he ever owned a store, he would call it JQXZ to help people who also played the game.
Although he never really played a musical instrument, no one could master the air microphone like he did on those road trips. He’d grab anything near by and sing in to it with soul. He has a lot of soul. If it weren’t for his skin color and the culture of the small town he lives in, he could have been the next BB King. One of my earliest memories was hearing my step mom and him sing, “Afternoon Delight” together when they thought I was sleeping in the back seat.
He has more style than his own good, especially that one vacation memory I have when we went to Newport Beach in California. I was 17 and had just gotten relaxed on my towel ready to do some sun worshiping when I looked up and saw my dad. I was sporting a Body Glove brand swimsuit, tangerine orange. Almost in slow motion, as if Father Time himself was branding it deep in my mind while laughing at us, I looked over towards my dad, walking along the beach, wearing a Body Glove bikini, nectarine orange.
Forgiven, but never forgotten. A great visual that makes me smile every time I think of it. Thankfully, I have a lot of memories of my dad, in his prime of fatherhood. I’m grateful of the memories I had with my dad, like when he taught me how to tie my shoes, ride my bike, do a cartwheel and drive a stick shift. I love when he tells the story of the time I fell from my bike in attempt to ride without training wheels. I went full speed down a hill without mastering the brakes, the only thing stopping me was the big tree. I fell, hurt my finger and he came to my rescue and made me a glass of Nestle Quick strawberry milk. I chugged the beverage, and as my dad tells the story, I wiped my mouth and said, “Mmm. Berry.”
Today, my dad is teaching me more and more about character. For the past few years, my dad has developed a neurological disorder. It started on his 60th birthday when he noticed problems in his knees and arches of his feet. He then started noticing a deterioration in the muscle tissues in his hands. The deterioration has increased and his independence to work and live as he once did will never be the same. After many tests and professional opinions, the illness has no formal name but from what I can read from Dr. Google, I liken it to ALS. To watch my dad go from wearing a bikini at the beach when I was a teen, to now being pushed in a wheelchair has been difficult.
He is a testament to all of us in challenging times of maintaining a positive attitude and accepting our circumstances. Rather than complain, be bitter and shut down, my dad has made the most of his circumstances. And, although his speech is becoming less and less clear, he still has his sense of humor. At times I have no idea what he is saying but he will laugh and well, I just laugh with him. And for that, I am grateful.
Dad, this tribute is for you. You are a good man, teacher, memory maker, boo-boo healer and entertainer and I am thankful for you. Happy Fathers’ Day to all of you dads out there too, for the way you love your children and the way you live your lives, makes a difference in more ways than you realize.
